Tag Archives: celiac disease

Entertaining Your Gluten Eating Guests

image via IMDB

image via IMDB

Do you know what’s super fun? Having a house load of guests that you love. Lots of eating, laughing and of course, karaoke. But you know what’s not awesome? When you’re gluten-free and you’re secretly worried about what everyone will think since you’re serving gluten-free bread and stuffs.

Luckily, I have amazoids friends and family and even more luckily I’m super into saving my intestines so I won’t be serving up any gluten in my kitchen. (Bringing it in, and keeping it segregated is kind of okay, I just won’t be the one slicing up those bagels.) Still, as the only person who has to eat gluten-free, I want to make damn sure everyone is too busy stuffing their faces to notice what may or may not be in their breakfast. Also, I try to get everyone liquored up so aren’t as concerned about the food. That’s a pro tip, and you are welcome.

So here’s what I whipped up with visitors in town. Easy, breezy, yummy in all the gluten-y tummies. Continue reading

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Gluten-Free Prosciutto Lasagna, Perhaps for the Last Time

gluten-free prosciutto lasagnaYou guys, we’ve been eating a lot of gluten-free lasagna lately in our house. In part because lasagna is delicious, but the pure volume has increased because of my son’s love for Garfield, and by association, lasagna. This was his Halloween costume—

gluten-free lasagna recipeYep, it’s Jon Arbuckle. So once a week, most of the time, I make gf lasagna, which means I’ve started to get creative. Hence, the prosciutto roll-ups that are so easy even a Garfield-loving 5-year-old can do it.

easy gluten-free lasagna recipe(Hot tip: even if the lasagna says no boil, just give it a lil boil unless you’re using the amazingly flexible RP’s gluten-free lasagna sheets)

So we’re eating a ton of lasagna in our house, and for the first time I’m very concerned about my ability to continue scarfing it all down. Guys, dairy is suddenly all, “Back off, beatch,” and I do not feel so awesome when I ingest great big gobs of ricotta, mozzarella and Parmesan. In fact, ever since I’ve been doing this VB6 thing if I have more than a small (read=normal) amount of cheese and/or ice cream I feel like someone has taken a bag of oranges  and beat me right in my belly. So maybe I can’t have this amazing, kid-pleasing lasagna anymore? Or maybe I should have just stopped at one serving. Either way I’m learning a lesson in gluttony, or developing even more sensitivity to dairy. Which, if the latter is the case, FUCK THAT.

I know this isn’t the first time dairy has been like, “Uhhh, maybe don’t have an extra large milkshake with that cheeseburger,” but it’s happened twice in the last two weeks of me being vegan’ish. Perhaps an argument against veganism. I mean, I’ll argue against anyone if it means I can keep ice cream and ricotta in my diet.

Sigh. Here’s how to do that gluten-free lasagna thing. Continue reading

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Worst. Vacation. Ever.

banksy-graffiti-throwing-up-flowers.jpg.662x0_q100_crop-scaleDo you ever feel, sometimes, like the whiniest person in the universe? Sure, we’ve got a disease and it makes us quite miserable, but I have to say every time I read the comments here, go to a celiac conference, or just read my FB feed, I realize—damn, girl, you’re lucky! After all, my diagnosis was like, in five minutes, my family has been nothing but (mostly) supportive, and my kids are ALL IN on gluten-free pizza. Most of my vacations have been pretty great, as it seems I blow it on my last day. So when I got this email, holy marymotherofgod, WHAT HAPPENED TO THIS WOMAN????

Luckily, Sharone at The Gut Reaction has a helluva sense of humor. So not only can we LEARN from her incredibly horrific family vacation to the Dominican Republic, but laugh. Just a little. You guys, it was horrible. Here’s a snippet: Continue reading

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Pasadena Is About To Be Hella’ Gluten-Free & You Can Go For Free!!!

gluten free expoWho’s down for a totally gluten-free weekend in Pasadena? I know I am. The National Celiac Disease Foundation Conference is happening June 7-8th (which is coming UP SO FAST) and it’s a super party/information festival for all of us who are battling the gluten.

I love that CDF Expo and Conference. This will be my third year attending, and first year as an official blogger. I’m pretty sure I get to wear a hat that says “CDF FTW” or maybe “FUGLTN” not sure which. What I do know for sure is that I’ll be taking in all the information about what’s going on with the latest in celiac, gluten-free foods, and hanging out with other amazing bloggers who hate gluten. STOKED.

Whether you’re someone who wants to hear the doctors and researchers speak (which, of course you do because aren’t we just waiting for one of them to say, “Guess what? If you eat Jelly Bellys before croissants, you’ll be a-OK!”) you MUST register for both Saturday and Sunday, or rather Saturday for the conference, then Sunday is thrown in. I know I’ll be there. Mostly on account of the breakfast buffet that includes gluten-free French Toast, but also for the mad knowledge they will be dropping.

Then you can wander around the EXPO where you can try out all of the latest gluten-free products and some fantastic standbys, and maybe come by and give me a high-five. Because I’ll be hanging out as well! And just to make sure you’ll be dropping by and soaking up all that info, I’m giving away 5 (five!) passes to the Sunday Expo! That’s right, 5 passes!

All you have to do is comment below and tell me what you most want to see at the 2014 CDF Expo and I will randomly select you people and HOOK YOU UP. Then you can come by and say, “April, can we talk about poop?” FUN.

See you in Pasadena!

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On Getting Gluten’d

Why you gotta' play my mama like that?

Why you gotta’ play my mama like that?

Oh, hai. You guys, I have to say I’ve been feeling a big neglectful lately. When I was all up in the Whole 30 I was posting every damn thing I was cooking up. When I’m being normal, I’m all “Ohmygoddidyouseethis???” But I’ve had a rough week. A week that I’m pretty sure started with me getting gluten’d, and then I thought maybe some gluten-free fettucine alfredo followed by ice cream would be no problem, but guess what BIG ‘EFFING PROBLEM. Because apparently dairy is lining up to bite me in the ass. And then, I was so totally 100% pure eating that I can’t figure out why I’m still sick. Oh, right, it’s because you don’t get slipped gluten then go back to a normal life after you’ve pooped it out. Which is why I’m writing this post. Because, you know what? I don’t really think people get it when you say you have celiac and you can’t have gluten. I think people don’t get that this is a disease, and it has serious consequences, and those of us with this stupid sprue are actually sick. Like, have a disease. Which is why it’s called celiac disease.

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What to Expect at the Celiac Disease Foundation Expo: Books, Cookies & Dinosaurs

celiac disease foundation expoOkay, at least one of those things. And me! Me! I’ll be up in Pasadena this weekend at the CDF Conference and big ass gluten-free expo selling my books to the FIRST PEOPLE IN AMERICA. Whoo-hooo! So line up, celiacs. But don’t expect cookies or dinosaurs. That was totally false advertising to lure you in. Not unlike when you flip through the Anthropolgie catalog and you’re all, “If I bought that blouse, I could swing in a hammock overlooking a rain forest!” Just books.

Although I’m guessing you’ll get your fill of gluten-free goodies up in the expo. These gluten-free cookies? These are King Arthur’s Chocolate Chip Cookie Mix that my husband whipped up to provide my girl with a gluten-free cookie for a field trip. Sure they were delicious, but something is a little funny here in the court of King Arthur. You see, you have to provide your own chocolate chips. Luckily, we always have chocolate chips in my house so we were cool. It just seemed a bit, I don’t know, odd. I conveniently missed the note on the box of the gluten-free chocolate chip cookie mix that said, “make it special with your add-ins” and then took a second look and realized it actually said “gluten-free cookie mix.” Sorry, I was just distracted by that delicious looking chocolate chip cookie on the box. Don’t be fooled fellow gluten-freers! And bring your own add-ins.

Do you know one very special thing I AM bringing with me to the expo (besides, of course Gluten Is My Bitch: Rants, Recipes, & Ridiculousness for the Gluten-Free)?

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Filed under Celiac Disease, Giveaway, Uncategorized

Can We Talk About Doctors?

doctors celiacAfter spending a day-in-the-half in the hospital, first for myself, then for my daughter, I’ve recently had the delight of being exposed to a number of physicians. While I’m a big fan of my general practitioner, and don’t even get me started on my GI doc (so handsome, so unfazed by poop talk), whenever I’m sick I find myself in that position of playing phone dodge with my GP’s office. Usually I’m calling before they open, or after, or in that two-hour lunch break where the staff refuses to answer the phone for 15 minutes leading up and 15 minutes after. Which is how I wound up at one of those walk-in clinics on the weekend, and ultimately in the ER.

All doctors are not created equal, ya’ll. Some of them are all, “Umm, yeah you should NOT be taking these antibiotics,” and others are like, “I’m pretty sure it’s not the most powerful antibiotics in the world that you’re hoovering while being celiac, but merely a stomach bug,” as I’m being pumped full of morphine. Then there’s the, “It was probably that burger you had.” Ummm, don’t mess with my burger, people. Do. Not. Mess. (Although if it does turn out to be the burger, well, fool me once contaminated meat, shame on you . . . )

Then we’re all up in my daughter’s villi and the result is, “Looks good, but that blood test seems wonky, so let’s biopsy and talk about this celiac situation again.”

Okay. I get that maybe medical science isn’t all that exact. I get that people get misdiagnosed, non-diagnosed, and just ignored for years. But at this point I was preparing for my super duper exciting book release (TUESDAY!!!!) and my even more exciting book hocking this weekend at the CDF Gluten-Free Expo in Pasadena. (Yes, I do realize that “excited” and “gluten-free expo in Pasadena” do not usually go together. But you, my people, get it.) And instead of just sitting around staring at a pile of books, grinning like an idiot I’m instead staring at this gluten-free chicken soup and waiting for when I can actually eat it without yakking.

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